The most common and most likely answer to this crossword clue is the 10 letter word ABSTEMIOUS
I've seen this crossword clue in The Guardian
A
B
S
T
E
M
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S
More clues leading to the result ABSTEMIOUS
- I mess about, struggling to be self-disciplined
- Sparing sort of item sailors ring us about
- I mess about, drunk or sober
- Sober sailors ring us after rough time
- I mess about when lapsed Puritan
- I mess about, surprisingly unlikely to get sozzled
- Graduate bouncing check promises to pay, refraining from excess
- Sober sailor’s routine, dropping date for male
- Moderate debts after sailors met up
- Self-denying punk is a mute S.O.B.
Buddy explains!

The straight part
We know that "sober" is the straight/definition part of the clue. The straight part is often a synonym or definition, in this case sober = abstemious.The cryptic/wordplay part
In cryptic crossword there's often an wordplay/cryptic part as well.This part involves a more complex hint, such as an anagram, homophone, hidden word, etc.
Sadly, We don't have an explanation for this specific crossword clue yet.
What does ABSTEMIOUS mean?
ABSTEMIOUS adjective- Refraining from freely consuming food or strong drink; sparing in diet; abstinent, temperate.
- Sparing in the indulgence of the appetite or passions.
- Sparingly used; used with temperance or moderation.
- Marked by, or spent in, abstinence.
- Promotive of abstemiousness.